Half-assing Things

Now that you're onboard with my Ultimate Quest, it's time for a confession.

Once, when I was tasked with vacuuming the living room and dining room, I didn't move the dining room chairs and vacuum under the table. My dad totally called me out on it. He told me I half-assed it and then proceeded to make me feel terrible. [He was merely pointing out that I didn't do what I was told, but I was a super sensitive kid and I loathed the feeling of letting someone down, which I clearly did by not fully vacuuming. Also, I have all-consuming guilt when it comes to matters like these].

After the vacuuming incident, the half-assing thing stuck with me and I solemnly vowed to never half-ass anything again. [I was probably 8 or 9 at the time so I clearly had no idea how much half-assing can do for you. specifically in college.] It has been my experience that when you half-ass something, you're really just being a lazy fuck. I hate lazy fucks. HATE them. I also can't stand people who whine about shit but never do anything about it....BECAUSE THEY'RE LAZY. It's an endless cycle, and it's boring.

It recently occurred to me that I'm half-assing my health. My HEALTH! Everyone who knows me knows that I'm an avid runner, explorer, exerciser, and sweater [not the garment, I mean I like to sweat it out. duh]. I take my daily exercise, whether it's walking, running, P90X or Insanity, extremely seriously. I don't do well when I can't expell that energy [I have crippling anxiety].

For my mental and physical health, exercise is key.

So why isn't healthful eating? Trick question! It IS key. I just never committed to it before. I would eat semi-healthfully most of the time, but this bitch loves some fried chicken and as I mentioned in the last post, anything smothered in cheese. These things are not helping me! In fact, they're hindering my body from performing optimally.

It got me thinking about my daily choices, which contribute to my life goals. It's been a life-long dream of mine to run a half-marathon. I trained super hard and serious from January to May for my first half. It felt amazing to be able to run 13.1 miles and not explode. I didn't meet my time goal, but I didn't give up either. I knew that I would run another half, and thankfully my darling sister, Katie, came to visit me so we could run one together. This was my second half and Katie's millionth [she's so annoyingly amazing and I love her].

I didn't train as hard this time around because of a small incident involving sangria, my previously broken ankle, and a hole in my yard; but I did better than the first time! I trained as hard as I could for the few weeks I had to prepare.

So my question to myself is this: "Hey asshole, if you can train like a champ for races, why aren't you giving your body everything it needs to perform optimally? Why are you weighing it down with heavy foods and fats?"

I started to mentally list all the times I make poor choices, and they're always when we're ordering in or going out. You should know something about me. It's integral to this quest. I love going out to eat. I love everything about it. There's nothing better than a great meal with some great friends [Kelley, I'm looking at you]. But you know what I realized?  It's not going out to eat that's the problem. It's me.  It's my choices that were holding me back. 

Hello. My name is Shawnsie. And I am addicted to food. It's true. I'm addicted to sugar, fats, and all things delicious yet terrible.

And you know what? So are you. It's chemical, and it's not your fault. It's the way the world works these days. So the main part of my quest is to get over these addictions, reset my palate, and dive into delicious but GOOD-for-you foods. I know they exist. I've had them.  Most importantly, I'm whole-assing my health now. Yes, whole-assing. Dig it.

This blog is not only here to hold me accountable, but also to inspire someone else out there to take his/her life seriously. You don't go around playing Russian Roulette on the weekends, do you? If you do, yikes. Seek help. I'm assuming you don't, so clearly, you take your life seriously. And you should.  You don't have to go vegan or veggie, but maybe, just maybe this blog will inspire you to try something new or reach a goal or whatever!

If you're reading this blog, you should deeply consider checking out my friend Jenny's blog. She continually inspires me to do better, be better and step up to challenges. It's glorious.